Announcing the winners of the FCW caption contest

The entries are in, and the most recent FCW caption contest drew an astounding number and variety of ideas.

The entries are in, and the most recentFCW caption contest drew an astounding number and variety of ideas. At the time of this writing, 77 people took the time to submit a caption for the drawing featured below. As would be expected, there were a sizable (33) number of entries that featured a reference to telework or working from home, but there were some surprises among the other themes that were featured. Here are some of the entries that caught my eye, followed by the "winners," a highly subjective list chosen by our judging panel of one.

Number of people who requested not to have their name or email included if their caption was chosen for fear of being caught being creative on agency time:
3

Number of captions referencing a government shutdown:
4

Number of captions including a Bill or Hillary Clinton reference:
2

Christmas (in March?) references:
2

Number of captions with a deathbed or last will reference:
2

The caption that leaves me unsure of whether I want to fly into Dulles (submitted by Rick Flanagan):
"The Dulles telework center."

The best sexually frustrated male caption (submitted by Tom):
"Don't apologize for scheduling this meeting. This is the most action my bedroom has seen in awhile."

The caption that stands the scariest chance of becoming policy (submitted by Paula):
"In an effort to reduce federal employee benefits, they have implemented Tele-Sick, where you can be sick in bed and still work. Each employee is now required to have ergonomic chairs, a whiteboard and a tempurpedic mattress in their bedroom in order to qualify."

The best anti-telework caption (submitted by Kate):
“We all thought our manager would bend on the telework issue when she was confined to bed rest. Boy, were we wrong!"

Right-wing jab (submitted by anonymous):
"Once upon a time the President said we will create more jobs and reduce the deficit ..."

Left-wing jab (submitted by LiberALL):
"Don't you dare complain about this to me -- you're the one who voted for the Tea Party to downsize government!"

Best caption if edited (submitted by Ralph Buck, shortened by me):
"Just ignore Harry, he's on an alternative work schedule."

Number of captions playing off of "let's put this project to bed":
4

My favorite pun caption (submitted by anonymous in Williamsburg):
"You're sure lying next to him qualifies as a HubZone?"

And the top runners-up, in no particular order:
"Thank you all for coming in on such short notice. Don’t mind Harold. He’s not a stakeholder."
-- Shelby in Washington D.C.

"Perhaps my role in this project is too 'pivotal'..."
-- Brandon Jubar in Washington D.C.

"So, Greg, How'd that CDC study on absenteeism among teleworkers go over on the hill?"
-- CJ

“So, to review our virtualization plan: As ISSO, Terry here goes into the cloud first, we wait for the green light from him, and then the rest of the team gets an Ambien, a cookie and a bedtime story.”
-- Michelle in Washington D.C.

"Let's do this quickly, I don't want to keep you from your families."
-- anonymous

"Sweetie I really think it's time that we finally get a computer."
-- Jim McKinnon in Odessa, Texas

"It has come to my attention that in many knowledge areas we may be one deep."
-- Barbara

And the No. 1 entry, submitted by Tamira in Auburn, Wash.:
"I put the printer in the bathroom so we wouldn't wake Dave."

John Klossner caption contest

X
This website uses cookies to enhance user experience and to analyze performance and traffic on our website. We also share information about your use of our site with our social media, advertising and analytics partners. Learn More / Do Not Sell My Personal Information
Accept Cookies
X
Cookie Preferences Cookie List

Do Not Sell My Personal Information

When you visit our website, we store cookies on your browser to collect information. The information collected might relate to you, your preferences or your device, and is mostly used to make the site work as you expect it to and to provide a more personalized web experience. However, you can choose not to allow certain types of cookies, which may impact your experience of the site and the services we are able to offer. Click on the different category headings to find out more and change our default settings according to your preference. You cannot opt-out of our First Party Strictly Necessary Cookies as they are deployed in order to ensure the proper functioning of our website (such as prompting the cookie banner and remembering your settings, to log into your account, to redirect you when you log out, etc.). For more information about the First and Third Party Cookies used please follow this link.

Allow All Cookies

Manage Consent Preferences

Strictly Necessary Cookies - Always Active

We do not allow you to opt-out of our certain cookies, as they are necessary to ensure the proper functioning of our website (such as prompting our cookie banner and remembering your privacy choices) and/or to monitor site performance. These cookies are not used in a way that constitutes a “sale” of your data under the CCPA. You can set your browser to block or alert you about these cookies, but some parts of the site will not work as intended if you do so. You can usually find these settings in the Options or Preferences menu of your browser. Visit www.allaboutcookies.org to learn more.

Sale of Personal Data, Targeting & Social Media Cookies

Under the California Consumer Privacy Act, you have the right to opt-out of the sale of your personal information to third parties. These cookies collect information for analytics and to personalize your experience with targeted ads. You may exercise your right to opt out of the sale of personal information by using this toggle switch. If you opt out we will not be able to offer you personalised ads and will not hand over your personal information to any third parties. Additionally, you may contact our legal department for further clarification about your rights as a California consumer by using this Exercise My Rights link

If you have enabled privacy controls on your browser (such as a plugin), we have to take that as a valid request to opt-out. Therefore we would not be able to track your activity through the web. This may affect our ability to personalize ads according to your preferences.

Targeting cookies may be set through our site by our advertising partners. They may be used by those companies to build a profile of your interests and show you relevant adverts on other sites. They do not store directly personal information, but are based on uniquely identifying your browser and internet device. If you do not allow these cookies, you will experience less targeted advertising.

Social media cookies are set by a range of social media services that we have added to the site to enable you to share our content with your friends and networks. They are capable of tracking your browser across other sites and building up a profile of your interests. This may impact the content and messages you see on other websites you visit. If you do not allow these cookies you may not be able to use or see these sharing tools.

If you want to opt out of all of our lead reports and lists, please submit a privacy request at our Do Not Sell page.

Save Settings
Cookie Preferences Cookie List

Cookie List

A cookie is a small piece of data (text file) that a website – when visited by a user – asks your browser to store on your device in order to remember information about you, such as your language preference or login information. Those cookies are set by us and called first-party cookies. We also use third-party cookies – which are cookies from a domain different than the domain of the website you are visiting – for our advertising and marketing efforts. More specifically, we use cookies and other tracking technologies for the following purposes:

Strictly Necessary Cookies

We do not allow you to opt-out of our certain cookies, as they are necessary to ensure the proper functioning of our website (such as prompting our cookie banner and remembering your privacy choices) and/or to monitor site performance. These cookies are not used in a way that constitutes a “sale” of your data under the CCPA. You can set your browser to block or alert you about these cookies, but some parts of the site will not work as intended if you do so. You can usually find these settings in the Options or Preferences menu of your browser. Visit www.allaboutcookies.org to learn more.

Functional Cookies

We do not allow you to opt-out of our certain cookies, as they are necessary to ensure the proper functioning of our website (such as prompting our cookie banner and remembering your privacy choices) and/or to monitor site performance. These cookies are not used in a way that constitutes a “sale” of your data under the CCPA. You can set your browser to block or alert you about these cookies, but some parts of the site will not work as intended if you do so. You can usually find these settings in the Options or Preferences menu of your browser. Visit www.allaboutcookies.org to learn more.

Performance Cookies

We do not allow you to opt-out of our certain cookies, as they are necessary to ensure the proper functioning of our website (such as prompting our cookie banner and remembering your privacy choices) and/or to monitor site performance. These cookies are not used in a way that constitutes a “sale” of your data under the CCPA. You can set your browser to block or alert you about these cookies, but some parts of the site will not work as intended if you do so. You can usually find these settings in the Options or Preferences menu of your browser. Visit www.allaboutcookies.org to learn more.

Sale of Personal Data

We also use cookies to personalize your experience on our websites, including by determining the most relevant content and advertisements to show you, and to monitor site traffic and performance, so that we may improve our websites and your experience. You may opt out of our use of such cookies (and the associated “sale” of your Personal Information) by using this toggle switch. You will still see some advertising, regardless of your selection. Because we do not track you across different devices, browsers and GEMG properties, your selection will take effect only on this browser, this device and this website.

Social Media Cookies

We also use cookies to personalize your experience on our websites, including by determining the most relevant content and advertisements to show you, and to monitor site traffic and performance, so that we may improve our websites and your experience. You may opt out of our use of such cookies (and the associated “sale” of your Personal Information) by using this toggle switch. You will still see some advertising, regardless of your selection. Because we do not track you across different devices, browsers and GEMG properties, your selection will take effect only on this browser, this device and this website.

Targeting Cookies

We also use cookies to personalize your experience on our websites, including by determining the most relevant content and advertisements to show you, and to monitor site traffic and performance, so that we may improve our websites and your experience. You may opt out of our use of such cookies (and the associated “sale” of your Personal Information) by using this toggle switch. You will still see some advertising, regardless of your selection. Because we do not track you across different devices, browsers and GEMG properties, your selection will take effect only on this browser, this device and this website.